The Adventures of Red, Game Red, and Ash Ketchum
by Loveon
Summary: In which Red meets two of his counterparts and they must journey to stop evil. It's crackness with a story!


Author's Notes: ...What the hell was I on when I came up with this? Anyways... Crackness with a story! :D Yarharhar.

By the way... The Red in this story would be the Red from Pokemon Special. So, uh, yeah. ._.

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**The Adventures of Red, Game Red, and Ash Ketchum**

It happened one day as Red was eating a muy delicioso snack. As he sat there on a bench, eating his muy delicioso snack, he was joined by another boy, who sat down next to him. Red had to say, this guy looked a lot like him… Aside from the hairstyle, he wore the exact same outfit.

"…Who're you?" he asked.

"I'm your alternate Red," he answered.

"…What?"

"I come from an alternate dimension."

"Oh. Okay."

"You can call me Game Red."

"Okay."

Red seemed to accept Game Red's explanation quite well.

"I need your help."

"With what?"

"We must," he paused, "find an ice cream machine. And destroy the button."

"Um, what?"

"I said-"

"No, I heard what you said. I mean, what the hell are you talking about?"

Game Red narrowed his eyes at him. "There are many ice cream machines all across the world. One of them has a highly dangerous button as one of its options, and if someone were to press that, it would be the end of this world."

"Oh. That's bad."

"I know. That's why I traveled from my alternate dimension to come here and request your help."

"Wait a sec… If you live in an alternate dimension, that would mean things are different, right? So, how do you know that there're dangerous ice cream machines in this dimension?"

Game Red didn't answer and stood up, yanking Red up with him. "Come on, let's go. As we search for the dangerous ice cream machine button, we will discover and taste many kinds of delicious ice cream."

"…Okay."

Red puts up with the things Game Red tells him too easily.

And so, Red and Game Red traveled all cross the world, trying out all the muy delicioso ice cream they could find. There was Oran Berry flavored, Sitrus Berry flavored, Old Book flavored, Dirty Gym Socks flavored, and even Pikachu flavored. And they when they reached a very suspicious looking ice cream machine, one that had a giant red button that said "DO NOT PRESS!1!one!" they had to wonder if this was the dangerous button they were looking for.

"Could it be…?" Game Red asked.

"I don't know… Maybe?"

"It's highly possible…"

"Like, the probability of a Jynx being female?"

"No, more like the probability of a Squirtle being male…"

"I wish I had a female Squirtle."

"Yeah, me too."

"Should we destroy the button?"

Game Red looked at Red and said, "YES."

They both sent out their Pikachus, both of them ordering the same move from them, "Use Thunder!"

The Pikachu let out a bolt of electricity, electrocuting the machine and causing it to spit out multiple ice creams. The machine exploded, and in its place was a boy wearing a cap and a Pikachu on his shoulder.

"Who're you?" Game Red and Red asked.

"I'm Ash Ketchum!" he answered. "I've come from an alternate dimension to request a favor of you!"

"Don't tell me…" Red began, "there's an ice cream machine with a dangerous button that'll destroy the world?"

Ash Ketchum shook his head. "No, I was going to say… There's an evil Spiky-Eared Pichu roaming around… And it's a crazed time traveler that we need to stop before its uses Celebi's time traveling ability TIME TRAVEL!"

Game Red and Red looked at each other. "…What?"

"I said we have to stop a time traveling Spiky-Eared Pichu from using Celebi's time traveling ability called TIME TRAVEL!"

"Very well! We'll help you!"

And so began Red, Game Red, and Ash Ketchum's journey across the land to find a Spiky-Eared Pichu.

They soon encountered the psycho, rabies-invested creature, twitching around as it held Celebi hostage with a knife.

"Pichu, Pichu! Pichy Pichu Pichu!"

"…I didn't understand one word of that," Ash Ketchum said.

"Why are all of those words capitalized?" Red asked.

"Rather, the Pokémon's names should all be in capitals only," Game Red said. "It's game canon."

And so, the Spiky-Eared PICHU held CELEBI hostage.

"PICHU, please let CELEBI go!" Red shouted.

"Pipipi!"

"Oh, god, I think I found out why it's so rabid!" Ash Ketchum exclaimed and looked at the other two. "For the past four DP series movies, there's been at least one character voiced by that famous woman…"

"That famous woman?" Red asked.

"Who is it?" Game Red asked.

"Shoko Nakagawa."

"Omg, rly?" Game Red asked, using pathetic word abbreviations.

"Really," Ash Ketchum said and nodded. "And the Spiky-Eared PICHU was one of them voiced by her. Luckily, she was voiced by Kayzie Rogers in the English version, but the side affects still remain from the Japanese Pokémon Company totally whoring out the poor thing. I mean, it didn't even appear in the anime aside from one movie, yet it got itself its own ending…"

Game Red looked at the Spiky-Eared PICHU. "…I feel bad for it."

"Yeah, totally."

"So you think that its gone crazy from being showcased so much?"

"Oh, yeah, first they tried to make people think it was a new Generation V Pokémon by covering it up with a question mark, and then they revealed it as a Pichu with a spiky ear… Sorry, PICHU with a Spiky-Ear. They gave out all sorts of information about it, and it had absolutely no privacy left about it. Hell, people knew its favorite food and everything… It was terrible."

Red covered his mouth. "The poor baby!"

"So, how do we fix this?"

"We have to break the news to it," Ash Ketchum said and nodded. "Spiky-Eared PICHU! You… received a voice change in the English version."

Spiky-Eared PICHU looked up at them, foam spraying from its mouth.

"You are voiced by Kayzie Rogers in the English version!" Ash Ketchum announced. "And you were not as whored out in North America as you were in Japan."

All of a sudden, the PICHU's ear hair flattened down at it looked like a normal PICHU. CELEBI ran away in fright and used its time-traveling ability TIME TRAVEL to disappear.

And so, Red, Game Red, and Ash Ketchum's journey to stop trouble came to a close.

…Or did it?

* * *

I'm so sorry if you suffered brain damage from that. I should, like, do another story like this. 'Cause I had too much fun writing it. Damn.


End file.
